Birthday wishes are only so fun when you feel like you are walking through a dark valley.
Charlie is the name of our baby girl who is in Danielle's belly, and we decided for the first time with any of our kids to name her before she is born! The last week or so has been extremely challenging in our house. From spending most of the night in the ER on Friday- Sat, to running from doctor to doctor for continuous updates on her status.
Little did we know when we named her that her name means strength, and that she is "warrior." That is exactly what we need her to be! She will need to battle through and overcome some adversity and the odds to make it though!
On Sat night most of the amniotic fluid was lost for no apparent reason, and she really needs it to grow and be strong, and to allow her lungs to grow!
The doctors although empathetic and sweet, have been incredible, but they are also clear that the numbers are not in our favor. Both of our specialists have also told us that they will not rule anything out because they have seen it all! That if we are believers that it may be time to start praying. I thought, we can do that!
On the way home, I asked Dani, can I ask my guys to come over, and she instantly said yes.. Within 2 hours we had 15 people in my living room praying over us asking our Lord above for a miracle. It was such an incredible show of love. (His greatest gift) We were so moved, and grateful. As we move forward we had an option, clam up, be silent and retreat or plug forward, doing our best to live in obedience with what we say we believe!
This time has been extremely challenging for us all, including the little ones and they do their best to process all that is going on! As we Sat them down on Sunday, for Riley and Bryce, well they lost it, while Graham was the clown keeping us smiling and laughing! We as a family have been praying and sharing, laughing and crying begging our Father above for strength and a miracle.
Monday came and went as a blur and the visit with the specialist was less about what he said and more about what he has been avoiding to say. The Odds... When asked we were given several scenarios of which most are not what we want, but the biggest was, well, "I am not going to say impossible, I have seen it all." If you "Believe," now would be a great time to pray! I left there broken, and from moment to moment holding back the tears. I said to Danielle, how can I love someone so much that I have never met, touched, seen.. I know we were both dying a little on the inside, clinging on to, there has got to be a way, or if not, it has to be part of God's plan. HE is in control.
So as I was looking down the face of my birthday and the BD wishes to come, and the questions, hey where are we gonna go for your Birthday, I could not think of celebrating! All I could think about was our little girl.. I wanted to hear kids playing, and lifting up prayers to Heaven. LORD HEAR OUR PRAYER! I had the most incredible birthday celebration with easily 80-100 people in the park there to play, and send a prayer up to the heavens. WOW... That many people cared to take the time, and to come together to pray. Moms, & Dads, Friends & Family, all came to lift Danielle & Charlie up in prayer. You want to talk about moving... Wow! Danielle wasn't quite up to coming but thanks to FaceTime, we brought her in on a video feed where I KNOW she felt the love!
We can't thank you enough for the Phone Calls, Texts, Messages, Notes and more and how they keep us going! Thank you for giving us strength through this outpouring of love!
As for today, well, last night was another restless night, Danielle is on bedrest, we had a Dr appt today, and we did not have much change. We are praying on a miracle, and we know that our God is so much bigger than this. We will not give up, we will not waiver!